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If it seems like I am extra pithy this week it is because I am overworked, underpaid and we lost the first version of this week's News Watch via an ugly accident. So, this is the 2nd go-around for me.
This week, we've got the Hot Five from the Debris Field, featuring annoying ghost hunters, Seth Shostak invades the UK, ancient swear words discovered, a Baltic war over pigs, and an esoteric dome makes a comeback. Future News Now looks at a "list" that may be coming to a country to you. Khyron has a "Late Night Stinker Showcase" in "That's Entertainment ! with Khyron". I catch you up to date on the Red Sox and rant about Mike Remlinger in "My Fandom : Year 2". And ... in a historic event ... in leiu of an actual Editorial ... the first official picture of the "Captured Bigfoot". Yes, you heard it right.
Hot 5 Stories from The Debris Field
The links are straight from Lesley's blog The Debris Field. The commentary is pure binnall.
1>Redlands police deal with ghost-hunting trespassers (KESQ News)
http://www.kesq.com/Global/story.asp?S=3720988
I predicted this a few months ago in this column and here it is. Ghost hunters gone awry. It seems like this has been a problem for the past 20 years at this place, but now it is getting some media attention. I'm sure we'll eventually hear the story of the dude who died while hunting for ghosts.
The legend may be harmless, but police say they are tired of sending patrol cars to the campus to keep trespassers away.
So authorities intend to install a video surveillance system _ not to catch the ghost, but the ghost hunters. 2>The proof is out there ... (Guardian)
http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/lastword/story/0,13228,1550737,00.html
I'm fairly certain this was the same "op-ed" piece penned by one Seth Shostak that made the rounds a few weeks back. I've no clue why London's The Guardian just picked it up a few days ago. Sadly, it seems the foolishness of Shostak's "science" is spreading across the Atlantic. Be forewarned, my Euro brethren, trust not the Shostak.
That's because the evidence is weak. During a recent show in which I participated, guest experts who have long studied UFOs argued for extraterrestrial presence by showing photographs of putative alien saucers at low altitudes. Some of these objects appeared as out-of-focus lights; others resembled hubcaps or frisbees.
3>Russian archaeologists discover ancient birch-barks with profanities(RIA novosti)
http://en.rian.ru/science/20050819/41190073.html
As a secret fan of "curse words", I was delighted to see this story. Good to see the fine art of cussing out someone has been in existence for centuries. In honor of this find, I will now be scrawling expletives on birch-bark and giving it to my enemies as a tribute to "old school swearing".
Archaeologists have discovered two profanity-inscribed ancient birch bark pieces in Veliky Novgorod in northwestern Russia, the local culture, cinema and tourism committee said.
Archaeologists did not disclose the texts. They only said one of the findings was a note written by a woman to her acquaintance in which she reprimanded the latter for not paying her debt. The other piece is said to be part of a larger document not found so far.
4>Belarus to attack Lithuania with thousands of pigs in return to Lithuania's plans to build spent nuclear fuel pools (funreports.com)
http://funreports.com/fun/19-08-2005/1259-pigs-0
Perhaps this is what zany redneck Wade was talking about last week with Ian Punnett on C2C when he was refering to Baltic strife. The weird thing about this article, to me, was that they never say what's so wrong about a pig farm. I guess it really smells or something, because it sounds like Belarus and Lithuania are ready to get nuclear over it.
Lithuanian Minister for Foreign Affairs, Antanas Valenis, promised to take adequate measures in return in the event Belarus was going to launch the construction of two pig-breeding complexes on the border with Lithuania. It is noteworthy that the two pig farms, which Belarus plans to build, will be the largest pig complexes in Europe. More importantly, however, Belarus plans to attack the Baltic state with pigs in revenge to Lithuania's initiative to build spent nuclear fuel storage facilities on the border with Belarus, RIA Novosti reports.
5>Built for time travel, dome now enjoying renaissance (thedesertsun.com)
http://www.thedesertsun.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20050820/LIFESTYLES0801/508200310/1050
Neat story here about a Tesla-esque eccentric who built a dome to communicate with folks from Venus. Since esoterica is all the rage in today's society, it's enjoying a rebirth, almost like Nancy Lieder on Coast a few weeks ago. Speaking of which, this guy who built this thing, and has since died, really was before his time. His convoluted dome used for time travel and alien talk is tailor made for a 3 hour chat with Noory. Perhaps we can get Sylvia Browne to channel him and make a date of it on C2C.
The two-story white dome near Landers was originally built as a time travel and human rejuvenation machine by a man who claimed to be carrying out plans revealed to him by visiting Venusian extraterrestrials.
Now, it's enjoying a renaissance as a Mojave Desert mecca for visitors who consider it a health and spirituality center, as well as scientists who say the building and its location are warranting scientific investigation.
Offenders database 'to cut crime' (BBC via infowars.com)
http://www.infowars.com/articles/ps/database_offenders_db_cuts_crime.htm
A registry that keeps track of people "considered a public danger". This could be anyone. It's coming to the UK, thank God. If it works or danger looms in the States, expect it here in no time.
I'm not quite sure who determines "public danger", but if it someone fanatical, as often the case, we're screwed.
It controversially includes details on people who have not been convicted, but are still considered a public danger.
Minister Fiona Mactaggart said Visor could help reduce crime and was "a step change in public protection".
That's Entertainment ! with Khyron
Posted @ When Coast to Coast AM doesn't keep my interest, or when static prevents me listening, I will turn on the television in search of entertainment. At 3 AM, the only programming options are infomercials and news rebroadcasts. However, every so often, I am gifted with a late-night matinee of some of the worst direct-to-video movies that the station could afford. Here is one such example:
"US Seals II: The Ultimate Force" - Directed by Isaac Florentine (2001)
When the movie began, I was glad to see that they were playing an action film, as opposed to the romantic/dramas that are usually aired in the early-morning time slot. With the title "US Seals II: The Ultimate Force," I was expecting an overly-patriotic, pro-war film with hundreds of faceless enemies being slain by an elite team of ultimate badasses--boy was I wrong. Despite the name, "US Seals II" has surprisingly few Navy Seals in it. In fact, of the two they show (yeah, that's right...two), one is the movie's maniacal antagonist.
A plot with this many holes is dangerous. A rogue Navy Seal, Ratliff (Damian Chapa) kidnaps a renowned nuclear physicist. She is taken to an island that was formally used by the Russian military for hydrogen bomb testing--which, for some reason, left the surrounding atmosphere with a dangerously high amount of methane gas. Because a single spark could destroy the entire island, the rescue mission is lead by kung-fu trained, former Navy Seal, Casey (Michael Worth). He assembles a team consisting of a knife expert, and chain-swinging expert, and a guy that uses an acid-shooting paintball gun. Together, they kick heads and clash swords (despite the risk of creating a spark) to save the free world from nuclear attack.
Far from the action film I was expecting, "US Seals II" (despite its original intentions) would be best described as a comedy. The dialogue and acting are so poor and cheesy, one cannot help but chuckle. The opening fight sequence, alone, is comic genius. It consists of a confusing gunfight with unnecessary back-flipping and a rocket launcher that appears out of nowhere.
It felt like director Isaac Florentine was trying to emulate classic kung-fu movies--that, or make fun of them; it's hard to tell. Every time someone moves their head or swings an arm, they play this annoying whooshing noise. And, as I stated above, this movie has a deplorably large amount of unnecessary acrobatics. Characters will choose to perform a triple front-flip to clear a low-lying obstacle, as opposed to the obvious, stepping over it, approach.
If you can enjoy truly bad cinema, or are some kind of sadist that prefers not to have a good time, then "US Seals II: The Ultimate Force" is for you. However, I'm sure you will be hard-pressed to even find this movie. Don't be outraged if your local movie rental store doesn't have it--because, quite frankly, I wouldn't blame them.
Rating: 1/5
Contact Khyron here : My Fandom : Year 2
The Sox sorta treaded water all week, losing a few to Detroit and Anaheim, but winning their fair share as well, so not much has changed in the standings, as they remain 4 games ahead of the hated Yankees. I'd prefer if it were 7, but hopefully it will get to be there in about 2 weeks or so.
As expected, the Red Sox parted way with Mark Bellhorne last Friday. Everyone seemed kinda sad to see him go, but it was for the best. Much like putting your old dog down, you don't want to see it happen, but are glad when it is over.
Meanwhile, Curt Schilling will be returning as a starting pitcher on Thursday against the awful Kansas City Royals. The Royals just ended a 19 game losing streak, so it should be a good old fashioned beat down. Of course, everyone in Boston will be hyper sensitive to how Schilling does in his first outing as a starter since April or so. The "Schilling as closer" was average at best and really just a stop gap measure to keep the team going for the remainder of the Summer. Consensus opinion seems to be that the Sox have to have Schilling as a starter if they are going to go far in the playoffs.
On Friday, David "Big Popi" Ortiz flipped out on the umpire over called strikes. I couldn't help but laugh at the puny coaches trying to restrain Ortiz as he screamed at the ump. Popi even threw in a nice little pantomime of a batting stance that was earned points for creativity with me. My advisors tell me that Ortiz probably will just get a slap on the wrist as punishment from MLB, which is hopeful, because it would hurt the team to lose him for any lengthy period of time.
I also have a new favorite player to hate, when I am not hating Edgar Renteria and Kevin Millar, and that is relief pitcher Mike Remlinger. Remlinger, who looks like he just stepped out of the '80's, is just plain fugly. It took him 3 games to finally record an out as a member of the Red Sox. He's let up a grand slam and a three run homer in the past week or so. You know things are bad when Remlinger shows up.
I've dubbed him the Guitierrez of the 2005 Red Sox team. This is an obscure inside joke because there was a guy who just showed up on the Sox last year named Ricky Guitierrez. He'd looked older than dirt. We always wondered how he even managed to get on the team and ultimately decided that he probably just followed the team around until they let him play. Hence, Remlinger is 2005's Ricky Guitierrez. I'm sure that is an awful comparison, but it works for me.
This coming week, the Red Sox play Kansas City in Kansas City and then Detroit back in Boston. This homestand will be the longest of the season for the Sox, something like 2 straight weeks of home games. They are amazing at home, so I expect and hope that they will be able to put some distance between themselves and the hated Yankees.
The Noory Story Showdown
This Week's Point Getters : Lemme know if I missed ya. I am considering adding a "Divisional Championship" for each individual message board, but that is in the "grey basket" right now.
Streamlinkers : mirage scored 2 points with "Two Illegal Immigrants Win Arizona Ranch in Court Fight" and "USDA finds 1,000+ violations of mad cow rules". GreenMoon scored 2 points with "Russia and China to participate in war games..." and "Magnitude 7 Earthquake hits Japan"
theUSofE.com : Oscar scored a mammoth 7 points with "Tsunami clue to 'Atlantis' found", "250 miles per gallon? They're doing it!", "Gas prices set another record", "Panic ensues in rush for cheap laptops", "Madonna breaks bones in riding accident", "BTK serial killer Dennis Rader gets life", "Senators: Global warming signs obvious",
baemark scored 4 points with "Space Shuttle heads back to Florida", "Attackers Fire Missles at US Navy Ship", "Al Quedda claims responsibility for missle attacks", "Merck blamed in death of Vioxx suit: jury awards $253 mill".
jerikai scored 1 point with "7.2-Magnitude Earthquake Hits North Japan" and majestic peak scored 1 point with "Israeli Soldiers Clear Out Gaza Strip"
Current Standings as of 8.22.5 : Baemark (30), Oscar (27), Tony1 (6), mirage (5),somnus (5), dark matter (4), Majestic Peak (3), jerikai (2), Green Moon (2), Shredder (2), Japanese American (2), SomeAverageJoe (2), anotherlight (1), cns (1), 1234 (1), WTL (1), and FAZER (1).
Score 1 point for posting a news story that gets read by George Noory, Art Bell, or a guest host on the show. Stories posted after they are read by the hosts do NOT count. If you are not credited by me in News Watch, YOU are responsible for letting me know that I missed it. You can ONLY post your news stories in either the Streamlink message board "Current Events" folder or the U.S. of E. message board "Current Events" folder. (News Stories posted in individual episode folders or "Anything Goes" do not count)
The WINNER is the person with the most Noory Story points (cumulative) in the January 2nd, 2006 Edition of News Watch.
The 1st PRIZE is a $40 dollar shopping spree @ the official binnallofamerica.com store.
The 2nd & 3rd place PRIZES are binnallofamerica.com T-Shirts and a mystery surprise item.
Any questions / comments can be sent to tbinnall@hotmail.com This contest is REAL. No wagering, please. Editorial
On the advice of my spiritual advisors and lawyers, we've decided to postpone the "Back To School" editorial until next week. In place of that much longed for missive by yours truly, we provide you with some Newz so Hot that it just may not be true ...
Yes, it seems my spies in Happy Trail, California have done it again. Upon hearing the news, from Tom Bisardi no less, that Bigfoot had been captured, I dispensed them to get a picture of the elusive beast so that I may present it to the loyal readers of News Watch.
Posing as would-be investors in the big Bigfoot Expedition, they managed to snag this lone photo to share with you all ...
Hopefully, there will be a more public unveiling once "the doctors" settle their raging debate : the true origins of Bigfoot's hat.
On that creepy note, we end this week's edition of NW for the 2nd time. This has been an exhausting experience and I have learned my lesson to save frequently. Of course, I will promptly forget it again in a few days.
Plugs : Tomorrow @ BoA, Lesley's "Grey Matters" this week looks at 2012 and how it just might resemble a famous era of C2C : Y2K. Fun trip down memory lane with a promising look ahead to the future. Khyron is invading the halls higher learning, so no Ghost Files this week. In its place : August's binnall Flashback. I'll be looking @ Nancy Lieder's final days as a C2C guest back in 2003, prior to her banning and subsequent revival. Thursday ... Hot Newz. Friday, the binnall report gives up more info on the impending season premiere of binnall of america : audio, Season One. Saturday, of course, Saturday Night Punnett. Sunday, smoker dave. Monday, we do it all again here in the NW zone. Throughout the week, we'll be keeping tabs on this unfolding Biscardi Bigfoot story as well, so stay tuned for that.
Ahh, I'm off to enjoy the scant hours I have left in the day to relax and enjoy myself. Have a good one and remember to be safe, be prepared, and be real.
