Is the weekend gone already ? Ugh. At least we have our Monday hangover that is News Watch. A thumbnail sketch of this week's contents : Mars wreckage found, a monkey escape, someone buys the Pope's car, Malaysia fingerprints babies, CIA moves to Denver, 6 points are scored in The Noory Story Showdown, Jackson Schmackson, and a special editorial : binnall's Summer Movie Preview. I think you'll enjoy.
Check out End Notes for the inside scoop on when the binnall @ X-Conference MP3 series will begin.
Hot 5 Stories of the Week
1>Report: Mars lander wreckage found (AP via CNN)
http://www.cnn.com/2005/TECH/space/05/06/mars.lander.ap/index.html
Only in the space exploration business can finding your own wreckage be considered a great success. Apparently, 6 years ago, NASA had a rover thing land on Mars. And land it did ... with a thud and then death. Now, since we've managed to at least get to Mars on a regular basis and seem to have continuing study of the planet underway, someone decided to look for the wreckage.
Here's where I am infinitely amused. Check out NASA's "proof" :
C'mon ! These are the people who don't take Hoagland seriously. These are the folks who claim that "the face" is a trick of light and shadows. If you'd tossed this pic at me a week ago and said it was Hoagland's latest lunatic fantasy then I would have believed you. NASA's credibility tumbles yet again. (Meanwhile, Hoagland's photo work now actually moves up a notch in my opinion considering this display from NASA)
Quote:
The observation came during a re-examination of grainy, black-and-white images taken by the orbiting Mars Global Surveyor, which searched for the probe with no success in 1999 and 2000.
"The observation of a single, small dot at the center of the disturbed location suggests that the vehicle remained more or less intact after its fall," wrote Michael Malin, president and chief scientist of San Diego-based Malin Space Science Systems, which operates the camera aboard Global Surveyor.
2>Monkey Escapes From S.C. Island Laboratory (AP via myway.com)
http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050508/D89V9C8G2.html
Uh oh. First Noory cops to petting monkeys, then a chimp mangles a man to death, and now this. That may be the most frightening headline ever and thoughts of radioactive apes running amok throughout South Cacalaca.
If you read the story, you'll notice how the folks at the lab insist the monkey had nothing dangerous about him and they were mystified as to why he "wanted to escape". From what I know of the black ops that go on in this country, my heart weeps for that poor primate. He'll probably be forced to wrestle a grey to the delight of MJ-12 or some other such sinister plan.
Quote:
"The 10-year-old, 20-pound male rhesus monkey was first noticed as missing from the island April 30, the same time residents of Coosaw and Lady's islands reported seeing him. Some residents were concerned the animal might carry an infectious disease because Morgan Island houses primates used in government research.
Alpha Genesis officials said they can't explain how the monkey managed to leave the island laboratory and make its way across Parrot Creek.
3>U.S. bid wins Pope's old VW after frenzied auction (Reuters via myway.com)
http://reuters.myway.com/article/20050506/2005-05-06T161556Z_01_L058907_RTRIDST_0_ODD-POPE-EBAY-DC.html
A follow-up on last week's big story about the Pope's car. The auction is over and some nut bought the car for almost a quarter of a million dollars. Rumour has it that the winning bidder was online casino GoldenPalace.com who have taken to buying lots of bizarre stuff from eBay and are planning on going on tour with their oddities.
I find it hard to believe that the publicity from the purchase nor the gate from bringing the car on tour will net the same amount as was paid for it. Then again, I may be underestimating the disposable income of America's yokels.
Quote:
A second-hand Volkswagen Golf once owned by Pope Benedict sold for 188,938 euros ($244,800) to a U.S. buyer in frenzied online bidding, a spokeswoman for eBay in Germany said Thursday.
4>California to ban hunting over Internet (AP via CNN)
http://www.cnn.com/2005/TECH/internet/05/04/internet.hunting.ap/index.html
Techno nerds throughout Arnold country are having their right to kill animals via online taken away from them. I feel bad for the one or two legitimate paralyzed guys who want to hunt online, but I fear that the service is most likely used by drunk high school kids and college frat "dudes". Therefore, take it away. I'm surprised the government wants to regulate it, considering the bloodlust it encourages through it's media and diplomacy.
Quote:
Wildlife regulators took the first step Tuesday to bar hunters from using the Internet to shoot animals, responding to a Texas Web site that planned to let users fire at real game with the click of a mouse.
The Fish and Game Commission ordered wildlife officials to prepare emergency regulations to ban the practice.
5>Malaysia to fingerprint babies (BBC via Infowars.com)
http://www.infowars.com/articles/bb/malaysia_to_fingerprint_babies.htm
Nearly "Future News Now". What does a podunk country like Malaysia do when they aspire to be as tyrannical as the big boys ? They do the best they can by fingerprinting babies. I'm not sure whether to chastise Malaysian officials or shake their hands in appreciation for their brilliance.
I think I will side with the babies, however. I see no reason why these crazy folks need their fingerprints unless it is a testament to their lazy police force ... or UN mandate. Perhaps even the smallest nations are doing their part to join the New World Order. I have my doubts fingerprinting every newborn will even work, given hand growth over time.
Quote:
Officers believe the move would improve the force's detection rate, and they may ask for a change in the law to allow it.
However, civil liberties groups in Malaysia have dismissed the fingerprinting proposal as poorly thought-out and illogical. Future News Now
CIA Plans to Shift Work to Denver (Washington Post via stevequayle.com)
http://www.stevequayle.com/News.alert/05_Global/050506.CIA-Denver.html
Mere days after I boldly proclaimed that the nation's capital would be moved to Denver to my google-eyed and doubting co-worker, does this article emerge. More proof of an eminent shift of national offices to Denver. Tie in the Denver Airport and a potential honeycomb of tunnels beneath that side of the US and something is afoot.
The pessimistic among you can fill in the blanks on what might cause such a move, but it seems to have been in the works for quite some time. The rumours have been circling for years. Expect something big to happen in D.C. that will necessitate a move to Denver. Given the altitude of the city, one suspects it may be a natural disaster and not terrorism. 2012 may factor in.
Note the quote from the "CIA veterans" and it's obvious they're trying to tell you something.
Quote:
The CIA has plans to relocate the headquarters of its domestic division, which is responsible for operations and recruitment in the United States, from the CIA's Langley headquarters to Denver, a move designed to promote innovation, according to U.S. intelligence and law enforcement officials. ...
Other CIA veterans said such a relocation would make no sense, given Denver's relative distance from major corporate centers. "Why would you go so far away?" one asked. "They will get disconnected." The Noory Story Showdown
This Week's Point Getters : Let's face facts. I did my best to keep up with Noory's stories, but sometime some slip through the cracks. That's up to you to send them to me and let me give you credit. Some do, I appreciate that. If I missed you, let me know and we'll fix it.
Streamlinkers : We begin with Brain Damaged Man Speaks after 10 years which was nailed on Streamlink by Dennis. Number of Beast wrong, should be 616 was netted by SomeAverageJoe. Mirage scores with PA Eatery Offers New 15 lbs. burger.
theUSofE.com : I must assume that Noory talked about Chief planner for Osama Bin Laden captured which give Degataga a point. Degataga also scored with Brain-damaged firefighter speaks after ten years. Oscar scores with Not 666 - - but 616 - - -Beast's real mark devalued to '616'
Notes : If Noory mentioned the death of David Hackworth, then there are more points to be doled out. As always, contact me if I missed you.
Current Standings as of 5.9.5 : Templar (9), Dennis (5), Oscar (5), mirage (4) FAZER (3), Jerikai (3), Baemark (3), Degataga (2), Valkryie (2), SimpleComplexities (2), TxStarGazer (2), Raven (2), shanesq1 (1), jerseyred (1), Dustminer (1), afeent1 (1), crimsonadam (1), sideshow (1), outuvbody (1), and SomeAverageJoe (1)
The Rules : Score 1 point for posting a news story that gets read by Noory or Art Bell on the show. If you are not credited by me in News Watch, YOU are responsible for letting me know that I missed it. You can ONLY post your news stories in either the Streamlink message board "Current Events" folder or the U.S. of E. message board "Current Events" folder (News Stories posted in individual episode folders or "Anything Goes" do not count) The WINNER is the person with the most Noory Story points (cumulative) in the July 4th Edition of News Watch. Subsequently, there will be a 2nd competition for the 2nd half of 2005, culminating on 1.2.2006. The 1st PRIZE is a $40 dollar shopping spree @ the official binnallofamerica.com store. Any questions / comments can be sent to tbinnall@hotmail.com This contest is REAL. No wagering, please.
Jackson Schmackson
The Jackson Trial reached stage two this week, as the prosecution ended its case on Monday with an associate of Jackson who pretty much agreed with their entire case. Most legal analysts saw it as a weak ended to a subpar prosecution. I think the mid-trial allowance of past accusers threw their plan for laying out the case for a loop. Not a slamdunk case against Jackson, but certainly enough to possibly put him away.
The defense kicked things off with adults who were once kids who hung out with Jackson and were not molested. Pundits claimed this may hurt the defense, because the kids' stories were pretty weird even without molestation implied.
Next, the defense called up the mothers of those kids and they backed up their story. Again, some think this may have hurt the Jackson camp.
Meanwhile, rumours circulated that Jackson was going bankrupt, but those rumours circulate once every 6 months. Every classic rock fan is holding out hope that it is true, so that the Beatles catalog will finally be free from his sticky, creepy hands.
The Jackson Scale : 70 (Last Week : 65)
Comment : The Jackson Defense Team's opening moves were questionable at best and severely damaging at worst.
A scale of 1 to 100, with 100 being nearly certain, I will deduce the odds of Jackson being found guilty and going to jail. This is not an opinion of his guilt, just a barometer of the potential outcome of the trial.
Editorial
binnall's Summer Movie Preview
Let's begin with the obvious. Slowly throughout my life, the infamous "Summer movie season" has crept further and further backward into Spring until it now seems to begin the first week in May ! What is this repulsiveness ? It is ruining Summer. Now, by the time mid-July rolls around and all the "big" films have come and gone, Summer seems over when there are still a good 6 weeks till Labor Day.
And, of course, a confession. In the past 5 summers, I have seen a scant 3 films in the theatre. (For obsessive compulsive binnall trivia fans those films are "Farenheit 911", "A.I.", and "Planet of the Apes") Unless it is a rainy day, I see no point in enduring an afternoon in a dark room with strangers, more often than not obnoxious children. This is, of course, after wailing for approximately 10 minutes about how the price of movie tickets has crept upward at a staggering rate. Throw in everyone's favorite socially retarded, and likely stoned, teenage employee of said cinema and you've a recipe for my disgust.
Roger Ebert's frail-by-comparison companion Richard Roeper may love this time of year, but no, my friends, I do not. For it begins with the plastering of everything with logos, characters, and catchphrases until one is awash in the "buzz" of next week's big flick. Last year, I cursed "Spider Man 2" for besmirching my beloved "classic" Dr. Pepper can. And I aim ready to curse again when this year's "Pepper Vandal" emerges.
Now that my requisite gripes have been dealt with, a look at what films I will be checking out (on DVD in the Fall) that are coming out this Summer :
War of the Worlds : Okay, I'll probably go see this film as it is the talk of Ufology right now. The real life intrigue of this film is enough to make Richard C. Hoagland demand five consecutive Coast appearances to rant about it. Note to others going to see the film, try and get your hands on one of the promotional pamphlets for the film as Stanton Friedman has an article in it. Aliens invading Earth ... what more could a Coast fan want ? Most esoteric film of the Summer.
The Longest Yard : Looks good.
Dukes of Hazzard : Looks awful, but I love Jessica Simpson in those shorts.
The Wedding Crashers : Owen Wilson is a genius. Vince Vaughn has amazing chemistry with him as well. Bizarre premise should make it a real classic, I hope.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory : Most likely very creepy. Tim Burton does amazing work. I expect this to be a fantastic, dark film.
The Bad News Bears : I love the original. I love Bad Santa. With Billy Bob Thornton as the Walter Matthau character this may work.
Bewitched : Probably crappy.
The Honeymooners : Worse than Bewitched.
Batman Begins : Summer blockbuster, of course. I'm not a big "franchise" fan, so I may catch this one on HBO in a year if I can enough and nothing else is on.
Star Wars III : A friend of mine once forced me to watch all 3 of the original Star Wars. I'm not a big fan. That said, I appreciate the passion most people have for the films, save for the strange ones, you know who they are. From all accounts, this one looks to be the best of the 3 prequels, but that's not saying much. Show me 3 Ewoks fighting Jabba the Hut, I buy a ticket. I predict Star Wars fans will go nuts and it will be deemed a major success both financially and artistically.
End Notes
I spent much of the weekend fine tuning and getting ready the launch of the first of a many week's series of audio interviews that I garnered at X-Conference in April. I would say that I am about 75 % done and just need to record the introductions for the first 3 and then will begin rolling them out. ETA for these MP3's : mid-week at best, this coming weekend at worst. 1st interview ... binnall and Stanton Friedman, 27 minutes of audio gold.
Meanwhile, Grey Matters is up on Tuesday with Lesley's look at the ABC UFO special. We hope to see more of Khyron on Wednesday, the Bigfoot Roundtable will surely be nominated for a Coastie at some point this week, and we've a few other good things in the works for once we get these MP3s squared away. Joe Vee informs me that his return is emminent and will be huge, so look for that as well. Stay tuned.
Until I return to parse through the news again ... be safe, be prepared, and be real.