Riding out on another seemingly tiny weekend, it's time for News Watch. No bells and whistles, yet, kids, but lots and lots of News and Opinion and a little fun along the way. And, if you do finish your vegetables, you just may learn something.

Hot 5 Stories of the Week

Can't say I'm thoroughly impressed by the results of polling, as the Yuschenko story won out last week via an anemic 1 vote. Therefore it was the consunsus opinion @ binnallofamerica to do away with polling on determining the Hot Story of the Week. It may return someday when you least expect it though. If you want to voice you opinion on which story is most important, post your thoughts here in the forum.

1.Blair and Gates in doodle mix-up (CNN via Reuters)

http://www.cnn.com/2005/WORLD/europe/01/31/doodle.reut/index.html

Creepy little story out the World Economic Forum (to which I was not invited, sadly). It seems Bill Gates and Tony Blair shared a table there and Gates left behind some doodles. The smarmy British press got a hold of them, thought they were Blair's, and recruited a bunch of "experts" to analyze them. But ... they were Bill Gates's doodles.

From the Article : Experts who examined the tangle of boxes, circles, loops and notes on debt and trade variously described Blair as "struggling to concentrate" or "not a natural leader" and "stressed and tense."

2>Once-Invincible 'Governator' Dips in Polls (AP via Myway.com)

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050131/D87V74C80.html

A story that has Alex Jones either dancing with glee or running in terror. It seems that Arnold is butting head with the legislature in Congress, you know, the ones he called "girlie men" and now people are turning on him. It appears the shine of being a movie star is losing its lustre. But don't count Arnold out, he's a cunning politician and his handlers appear to have a plan that may be a sign of things to come.

From the article : Schwarzenegger is threatening to employ his trademark strategy if he cannot get his way with lawmakers: bypassing the Legislature and taking his plan to voters in a special election.

3>Jackson trial starts (CNN)

http://www.cnn.com/2005/LAW/01/31/jackson.trial/index.html

I may credit CNN with the story, but it's pretty much everywhere. Disgusting. This story is essentially a primer with all the lurid garbage that has led up to the trial. And, of course, what Jackson was wearing when he arrived at the courthouse today. Ugh. In keeping with our smarmy look at the news, we'll be watching the Jackson trial coverage and all the esoteric tid bits that fall out. Is this a tad hypocritical ? Of course.

From the article : Jackson, clad in a white shirt, vest and pants with a gold-link charm belt, stood at the defense table, looking at all the potential jurors as they came into the room.

4>Skinny People Fidget, Fat People Sit (UnknownCountry.com)

http://www.unknowncountry.com/news/?id=4398

From the geniuses who brought you "obvious" and "obvious II". The worst part is that there is a Unversity somewhere striving to prove this thesis.

From the Article : In order to detect even the smallest toe tap, Mayo Clinic researchers invented a movement monitoring system that incorporates technology used in fighter-jet control panels. They embedded sensors in customized undergarments for both men and women.

5>Mystery fan marks Poe's birthday

http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/01/19/poe.visitor.ap/index.html

Perhaps my personal favorite story of this week's bunch. Some creepy guy breaks into the cemetary where Edgar Allen Poe is buried and performs a bizarre ritual there every year ... since 1949. Bizarre.

From the Article : For the 56th year, a man stole into a locked graveyard early on Edgar Allan Poe's birthday and placed three roses and a half-empty bottle of cognac on the writer's grave.

Future News Now

First Amendment No Big Deal, Students Say

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050131/D87V8BDG0.html

I believe the children are our future ... and we're screwed. Hopefully the draft will smarten some of these losers up. Perhaps the worst part is, they think the government should be able to censor the media, which we all know is occuring daily as it is. What a strange world.

From the Article : Yet, when told of the exact text of the First Amendment, more than one in three high school students said it goes "too far" in the rights it guarantees. Only half of the students said newspapers should be allowed to publish freely without government approval of stories.

Noory Stories

Hmmm. Kudos go out to news-loving Templar who found the "Mad Cow Found in Goat" article that received a lot of play on Saturday night's first hour with Art Bell. TXStargazer laid the groundwork for discussion on the "Iraqi Elections" which is a big topic in the news and will surely be picked up by The Noor tonight. Good on ya, friends.

Editorial

Magnetic Ribbons Make Me Mad

Let's start at the beginning. Where did these things come from ? You know, those magnetic "ribbons" that seemed to spring up overnight and appear ... on every car but mine. This wasn't some normal matriculation of a pop culture fad, no this was creepy. It started with "what's that" then "oh, there's another one of those" and finally it's "oh, crap, those things are everywhere now". I loathe it.

Now, as a faithful Alex Jones fan, I could probably rant and rave about how there is probably some kind of RFID chip in there tracking your every movement. But I don't believe that really. I could suggest, much like Steve Quayle perhaps, that it is another tool used by the government to weed out potential terrorists, but really I don't believe that either. I could, maybe someday, be like C2C regular Linda Moulton Howe and go interview the inventor of the magnetic car ribbon and have him say nothing of consquence. But, no.

I'll just chalk it up to the lemming like mentality of your every day cretin who drives the streets. These ribbons are somewhat trendy so every drooling numbskull needs one on his SUV or mini-van. Nubile young women slather them onto their sportscars and just as quickly lose them as soon as they are no longer the "in thing". Yes, folks, the magnetic car ribbons is where it's at.

But, I suppose, in the back of the minds of these automatons is the idea that they are also buying into the politically "in" thing. These mini ribbons have taken the place of the tattered flags that were on every car post-911. I find the rampant jingoism to be rather creepy and also quite sad.

Must I have a flag lapel pin and bumper sticker flag and a ribbon flag while also pledging allegiance to the flag and solemnly standing while we look at the flag for the national athem. I do pay taxes. It's depressing and it's senseless.

End Notes

Until we let the freak flag fly next week and comb the news like a balding man's last remaining hairs, I wish you all a fond farewell. Be safe, be real, and be prepared.